In preparation for our June 30 training event, our team has been speaking with single women to get their perspective on how we can better serve them. A common response was that the women desired to be seen but not singled out. In other words, notice us but don’t put the spot light on us. It’s a fine balance between recognizing the various women in the church or community and lumping them all into neatly labeled boxes. Too much attention is not always welcomed, or a good thing.
Over all, it appeared the women didn’t want to see a “Single Women’s Ministry” created under the banner of the Women’s Ministry. No desire for events to be launched that were solely marketed to the single women. They didn’t want to wear the scarlet letter “S” for single on their lapel. They also wanted to limit the assumptions made that because they were single it meant they had all the time in the world to volunteer, or had the desire to volunteer within the children’s ministry. Please don’t assume that their singleness is something they dread, when there are those who embrace it.
So, we march that fine line between seeing the women and recognizing their needs but meeting those needs without the fanfare and hoopla. We don’t need a “Single Women’s Table” at our next brunch, where we portion off those women into a neat little section. Yet, offering up a Small Group for Single Women becomes an option from the variety of studies you will offer. They can choose to join that group, but may elect another because the topic is more suited for her. In this, we have given them and option and we are also not putting them on display.
Overall, the general consensus was that the women who are single want to be treated just like everyone else. If you would send a meal over to the house of the flu stricken mom of three, send a meal over to the house of the single gal too. Drop her a birthday card in the mail, invite her to lunch, invite her to sit with you on Sunday morning.
Her singleness does not define her, or her gifts. She is a daughter of the King, just like you.